Realities

The magic umbrella
Originally uploaded by KarensJilly

It's funny how every day can have a different character. Sometimes we don't see it, because we let monotony get the best of us, but I think I'm noticing it more now that I don't have many responsibilities to worry about, because of break.

For example, yesterday I didn't shower and didn't get dressed all day. I was generally feeling like a disgusting, dirty human being because of this and because my friends are all leaving me to go back to school. Not to mention PMS. (Yay TMI!) But the entire quality of my day changed when I looked at my phone around 5:30 - the first time I had bothered to do so all day - and had a text from my friend L (who I had thought was already back at school) asking if I wanted to get Chipotle for dinner. I was elated by a) the idea of getting out of the house and b) the surprise of knowing she was still in town when I thought I was all alone! I called her back and we had a very adventurous dinner time eating our burrito bols up at a makeout point at Tilden Park haha. There was a great view, a wild fox, and some creepy guys smoking pot who tried to get us to roll down the window to talk to them, but we left at that point...

Today has been a pretty relaxed day, in comparison. I've spent some time thinking about how silly it is to separate the ideas of a fun, frivolous life and the mundane parts of life like worrying madly about money (which I am actually doing, unfortunately). "Real life" tends to be what I call that mundane part of my existence, and the fun, introspective side is too often deemed unrealistic. But both are real, sometimes too much so.

For example, I went to my grandfather's house today, where a piano lives, to try my hand at the keys after what is surely years of not playing seriously. I just played. I played arpeggios and old pieces, and my motor memory strained pathetically to re-create the chords and phrases. It was good for me, but very frustrating, very real.